The Lumberjack



Students Serving The Cal Poly Humboldt Campus and Community Since 1929

Tag: Marvel Cinematic Universe

  • “Avengers: Infinity War” spoilers

    “Avengers: Infinity War” spoilers

    Each Marvel movie has its own tone. Whether it is the quirky, fantastic realm of Taika Waititi’s “Thor: Ragnarok,” the darker, more realistic world of the Russo brother’s “Captain America: Winter Soldier” or the reality-warping ethereal world of Scott Derrickson’s “Doctor Strange.” Bringing all of these different worlds and tones together into one world with one tone is not a simple task.

    The simple way around that monolithic problem is to avoid it entirely.

    “Avengers: Infinity War” is supposed to be Marvel’s final boss. Every Marvel Cinematic Universe movie up to this point has been leading up to this event. It was never really supposed to be a movie; instead it is more of a superhero convention. The agreed upon prediction for “Avengers: Infinity War” was that the superhero convention would start with a bit of interpersonal conflict between all the different characters. They meet up for the first time, a big bad boy appears and all the main characters have to re-re-re-learn the lesson of teamwork. The reward would be the friends they made along the way.

    It is wonderful that the predictions were mostly wrong.

    The name of this movie should have just been “Thanos.” The real plot line is a strange character study shrouded in the guise of an Avengers movie. Thanos lurks in the corner of the MCU films. Whether he’s mentioned in passing by the main characters or shown in the flesh during an end-credits scene, he has always been in the background doing absolutely nothing. Now he takes center stage, and the superhero convention that is “Avengers: Infinity War” is just unnecessary weight. All the characters we know and love tend to drag the movie down, especially the ones that stay on earth for the entire movie. The concerns of Captain America or The Vision do not matter in the face of Thanos.

    It is such a shame the movie had to be an Avengers film.

    The best parts of this movie are beautifully surreal. There is thought put into landscapes and so much detail put into the expressions on the CGI purple face of Thanos. The most memorable moments are slow and touching or strangely twisted.

    The best fights in the movie are not punch-ups. The weapon that Thanos uses can control reality, so it is perplexing that the audience is asked to take swarms of heroes and faceless villains with all of their explosives and magical fists seriously. The movie makes it clear that Thanos is on a whole other level. He can manipulate the universe as he chooses. The movie would have been improved if most of the scenes on earth were completely cut out and replaced with further explorations of Thanos’ character and reality-bending powers. The threat Thanos posed to earth was on a different scale; so much so that all the explosions and action-packed fight scenes felt hollow.

    Before this goes on, here are the recommendations: If you haven’t enjoyed the MCU so far, this “film” is not for you. If you like the MCU so far, you will probably be glad you went to the theater. There are some shake-ups, some touching moments, some wit and a whole lot of sadness.

    This next part has many spoilers. Do not read on if you have not seen the movie.

    Thanos wins. He snaps his fingers and half of all life in the universe disappears. It cements the movie as something different. Nothing the main characters do to physically stop Thanos really mattered. The ending is heartbreaking and it should stay that way. Peter Parker panicking while dissolving in Tony Stark’s arms genuinely digs into the soul if you already care about these characters.

    But of course, Peter Parker cannot stay dead because there is another Spider-Man movie in the works. The weapon used to kill over half the main characters has the ability to rewrite time, so it does not take a genius to see what is going on.

    The biggest fault of this movie, and every other Marvel movie, is not a single part of the movie. Instead, It is the fact that it cannot just end.

     

  • A (cynical) guide to surviving the Infinity War

    A (cynical) guide to surviving the Infinity War

    Navigating the Marvel Cinematic Universe

    There are too many Marvel movies for people to keep track of. The combined 18 movies have earnings of more than the GDP of a significant amount of nations.

    Here is a guide through the Marvel storm as we approach the Marvel cinematic singularity: The Avengers: Infinity War.

    Disclaimers

    The movies and the comics are in two totally different realms of existence, especially when you consider deep comic book lore. For example, in the comics, Captain America is secretly a Nazi and Ant-Man beats his wife. For the sake of this guide, let’s pretend they don’t exist.

    There are two Marvel movies that take place in the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) that I have not seen. They are Louis Leterrier’s The Incredible Hulk, and Jon Watts’ Spider-Man: Homecoming. (There are just too many Spider-Man movies.) If anything incredibly important happened in those two movies that directly relates to Avengers: Infinity War, sorry.

    Plot

    All of the movies in the MCU somehow relate to objects called the infinity stones. For the purposes of the movies, they are convenient plot points. Something for heroes and villains to fight about. There are six infinity stones: red, orange, yellow, green, blue and purple. They are supposedly fragments of what came before the universe, and you know they’re important because they glow. The end boss of all the Marvel movies thus far is a mysterious purple man named Thanos who really wants to put the glowing stones on his glove.

    Characters

    There are the Earth Avengers, the Space Avengers and the Avengers In-Between. Only three characters have had three movies all to themselves: Thor, Captain America and Iron Man. Each of those characters represents a division of the MCU. Each of them has their own team of lackeys who make up most of the characters. The Guardians of the Galaxy are a separate group who also represent a sizable amount of characters. Every character connects with the infinity stones in one way or another.

    Where we left off

    When we last saw our brave heroes, Captain America’s lackeys and Iron Man’s lackeys did not like each other very much. Thor was in space after successfully destroying his homeworld with the help of the Hulk, and the Guardians of the Galaxy were also in space after killing Kurt Russell. The infinity stones are spread out amongst our heroes. The red stone was last seen out in space with Benicio del Toro, but his house blew up so no one really knows where it is. The purple stone was dropped off at John C. Reilly’s place, but Thanos has it in the Infinity War trailer, so R.I.P John C. Reilly. The yellow stone is in the living incarnation of Iron Man’s computer’s face. Benedict Cumberbatch has the green stone, and Thor’s greasy adopted brother has the blue stone. I could be wrong, but I don’t think that we’ve seen the orange one unless Spider-Man has it and no one told me.

    Predictions

    All 50,000 characters are going to learn to work as a team and form the mega ultra avengers. At least one of the main Avengers will die. All the actors must be tired of this whole thing by now, though it’s not clear whose contract is up yet and who will get an out. (It has been a decade since the MCU started, and each of them must have enough money to buy entire nations at this point.) Thanos will almost destroy the universe, but our brave heroes will stop him, and Disney will have all the money in the world by 2030.