The Lumberjack



Students Serving The Cal Poly Humboldt Campus and Community Since 1929

Tag: evergreen

  • Ask Evergreen: Cornered Cohabitant

    Ask Evergreen: Cornered Cohabitant

    Ask Evergreen is a weekly advice column by the students of The Lumberjack

    Dear Evergreen,

    What do I do when my housemate makes an advance on me?

    Dear cornered cohabitant,

    Every now and then we find ourselves in uncomfortable situations due to an unwanted admirer. Of course, it’s easier to avoid this when the admirer isn’t your housemate.

    You can steer clear of any further awkward encounters by trying the following.

    First, if your housemate has made it known they’re fond of you by making unwarranted physical advances, be sure to tell someone you trust or an authority figure. Having someone cued into this predicament can help you if your housemate decides to retaliate.

    Reach out to friends for moral support. They might be able to back you up when it comes time to telling your housemate off. You can even consult the school counseling services if you’re feeling agitated about the situation, or campus police if you feel in-danger around your housemate.

    Second, set boundaries. Make it known that you don’t appreciate the way they make you feel. Your most sacred space is probably your bedroom, so be sure to tell them to respect your limitations so you can maintain your safe space.

    Don’t let the familiarity or comfortability of a housemate relationship become a way for them to continue their actions. You don’t have to be friends with your housemate, especially not if they’re making you uncomfortable.

    Third, be kind but steadfast in your rejection. While you don’t owe your housemate an apology, you should be cautious with your rejection execution so you don’t aggravate the situation. Rejection brings out vindication in some, so be careful when breaking it to your housemate that you’re not interested.

    Lastly, talk with any other housemates you may have. See what they have to say about the predicament. They may be able to step in to deescalate things. You could all decide to have a household meeting where you can discuss how to best make a safe and comfortable home environment.

    Remember, you don’t have to do this alone.

    Good luck!

    Sincerely,

    Evergreen

    If you have any questions you’d like to send in, email us at contactthejack@gmail.com. We won’t publish any names and you don’t need to use one.

  • Ask Evergreen: Single and Seeking

    Ask Evergreen: Single and Seeking

    Ask Evergreen is a weekly advice column by the students of The Lumberjack

    Dear Evergreen

    How do I meet people without using online dating apps?

    Dear single and seeking,

    People still find connections through real life interactions despite the prevalence of dating apps.

    Although the existence of dating apps can help speed up the connection process, it’s desensitized many of its users to meaningful connections. Nevertheless, you can navigate through the chaos of cuffing season—or the season in which people pair up—without the digital drama.

    If you are completely against using the web to find love you’ll have to start putting yourself out into the world and approaching people. Start striking up friendly conversations with people at your favorite coffee shop or while you’re on your next hike in the Arcata Community Forest.

    While it may seem brazen to talk to strangers, you’re getting into an immediate conversation rather than thinking of a pickup line or waiting for them to make the first move on an app.

    This way may require thicker skin to deal with face-to-face rejections, but it also helps you learn the art of conversation and confidence.

    Don’t be ashamed to approach someone in real life, but don’t intrude on someone who looks like they would rather not be bothered.

    While you don’t need an app to tell you who to like, dating apps do help you to know who is available while also giving you a faint glimpse into the personality of a possible partner.

    Many online dating users intend to seek sex and nothing more. However, if you’re searching for a more meaningful connection, dating apps can still help. You can also find connections through the internet on places other than dating apps—just be cautious.

    As a student, you’re in a prime location for eligible singles. It’s just a matter of figuring out who’s looking for the same thing as you.

    If you haven’t already, explore a dating app just to see who is out there. Maybe someone from a class or a regular at your favorite coffee place is seeking too. You won’t know who’s out there until you look.

    If you are inclined to keep things organic, try to hang out in the library more often or sunbathe in the art quad.

    If all else fails, ask some trustworthy friends to set you up on a blind date.

    Good luck!

    Sincerely, Evergreen

    If you have any questions you’d like to send in, email us at contactthejack@gmail.com. We won’t publish any names and you don’t need to use one.

  • Ask Evergreen: Fretful Fueler

    Ask Evergreen: Fretful Fueler

    Ask Evergreen is a weekly advice column by the students of the Lumberjack.

    Each week we answer anonymous questions sent in by readers about anything and everything.

    Dear Evergreen,

    Is driving to Eureka for Costco gas worth it?

    Dear Fretful Fueler,

    Gas prices in California are some of the highest in the nation, with prices often spilling over $4.00 a gallon, but Costco offers some of the cheapest gas.

    Costco is a popular gas supplier, and here in Humboldt we are fortunate to have one locally. But although Costco gas is an option in the area, it’s not accessible to all.

    To get gas from Costco you must have a membership or a Costco gift card. As someone who doesn’t have a Costco membership, I can’t say for certain that Costco gas is the best alternative.

    For those who can afford the $60 yearly subscription, it makes sense to go to Costco if you’re already using their other services. However, if you plan on getting a membership just for a gas discount, I wouldn’t suggest it.

    If you aren’t a heavy commuter then Costco gas definitely isn’t a good source for fuel. According to Business Insider, the price of a membership won’t be paid off with your gas savings until you gas up around 37 times.

    Costco gas stations are also notorious for having chaotic waiting lines and times. If you do consider Costco gas, be mindful of the time of day you head over, as rush hour times are often busier. It would be counterproductive to wait upwards of 10 minutes for gas while idling in your car wasting fuel.

    If you aren’t inclined to fuel up at a Costco gas station, there are other places you can gas up at. You can find local gas prices with the site and app GasBuddy, which can help you shop around for the best option.

    In Arcata, the cheapest gas can be found at the Patriot station for $3.87 a gallon on Giuntoli Lane. In Eureka, the most affordable gas is from the Costco station which is currently $3.49 a gallon.

    Happy gassing!

    Sincerely,

    Evergreen

    If you have any questions you’d like to send in, email us at contactthejack@gmail.com. We won’t publish any names and you don’t need to use one.

  • Ask Evergreen: Cautious Collegian

    Ask Evergreen: Cautious Collegian

    Ask Evergreen is a weekly advice column by the students of the Lumberjack.

    Each week we answer anonymous questions sent in by readers about anything and everything.

    Dear Evergreen,

    I’m about to graduate and I’m feeling lost. I love this area, but the job market is garbage. I feel if I stay up here I’ll be stagnant. Should I err on the side of caution or dream big?

    Dear Cautious Collegian,

    Congratulations on nearly completing your college career! With one hurdle out of the way you now have the task of facing the world head on, whether you like it or not. It’s normal to feel the pit of existential dread sink into you around this time in your young adult life. Remember you’re not alone, and we’re all kind of misguided.

    You’re a step ahead of the rest by having this contemplation. It’s good to realize your options to sort out which path choice will bring you the most. Consider the monetary gain as well as the emotional gain you may receive from either decision. Remember, money isn’t happiness, but it does solve a lot of problems.

    If you stay in the area you will definitely save yourself money on the cost of living. This area is also quite beneficial to some in terms of emotional wellbeing because of the vibrant environment we have here. If that’s the case for you, you should add another tick to the Humboldt side.

    While staying in the Humboldt area could save you money, the job market is fairly bleak compared to the income you might get from a job in any city south of Mendocino County.

    It doesn’t hurt to apply to jobs all over. Definitely go big with what you want to do. A high-paying position in a field that you genuinely enjoy isn’t something to pass up on, but these dream positions aren’t always plentiful, especially if you’re applying in competitive areas.

    The Humboldt area isn’t all too competitive, depending on the career you’re pursuing. With that in mind, consider how you can upsell yourself in this area compared to another place. Your skills are more likely to standout in an area like this which can make it easier for you to fight for a higher wage, if a potential employer can afford it.

    Whichever decision you make, follow your intuition and don’t be afraid to take a risk.

    You’ve got this!

    Sincerely,

    Evergreen

    If you have any questions you’d like to send in, email us at contactthejack@gmail.com. We won’t publish any names and you don’t need to use one.

  • Ask Evergreen: Fight or flight

    Ask Evergreen: Fight or flight

    Ask Evergreen is a weekly advice column by the students of the Lumberjack.

    Each week we answer anonymous questions sent in by readers about anything and everything.

    Dear Evergreen,

    How do I become more of a fighter than a flighter?

    Dear Fight or Flighter,

    Discerning the best route to take for a situation can be strenuous on the mind as you decide whether to stand your ground or retreat peacefully.

    It takes strength to fight for something you believe as well as to flee from something that burdens you.

    Depending on the situation, you may want to be a fighter, flighter or both. There’s nothing wrong with running away from a situation, nor is it wrong to stay to strive for resolution.

    Don’t be a fighter just for revenge. You should have earnest intentions with the passion you feel for fighting for something, whether it’s for a cause, a relationship or an event.

    Remember, physically fighting someone is illegal. If you feel the need to duke it out with someone, cordially invite them to a round of fisticuffs at your local gym where the two of you can be coached professionally and geared up safely in a boxing ring.

    If you’re in a life threatening situation involving an aggressor, you should take caution with your departure. Don’t aggravate the circumstances by spouting back insults or being hastily bold.

    You should remove yourself from the situation and seek help from the authorities if need be. If you’re in a life threatening situation like a natural disaster, you should follow orders from the respective officials overseeing the event.

    Don’t try to be a hero if you think you’re incapable of fighting. Standing up to a situation with multiple people on your side fighting for the same sincere reason can help you all achieve something for the greater good.

    Fleeing from a situation, whether it’s a fire, flood or mass shooting isn’t cowardly. You’re allowed to be selfish to an extent if it saves your life, but don’t go sacrificing the safety of others by being a foolish fighter or a flawed flighter.

    If you’re in a situation that is less life threatening, fighting or fleeing are equal game—just use your best judgement. Ethical and moral dilemmas will challenge, but if you know and believe in the golden rule, you’re probably equipped enough to decipher the best outcome.

    Good luck!

    Sincerely,

    Evergreen

    If you have any questions you’d like to send in, email us at contactthejack@gmail.com. We won’t publish any names and you don’t need to use one.

  • Ask Evergreen: Stuck in the Middle

    Ask Evergreen: Stuck in the Middle

    Ask Evergreen is a weekly advice column by the students of the Lumberjack.

    Each week we’ll answer anonymous questions sent in by readers about anything and everything.

    Dear Evergreen,

    Should I just sleep with the two guys coming after me even though they have girlfriends because no other men like me?

    Dear Stuck in the Middle,

    You sure got yourself caught in crossroads with this one, but don’t fret. The best thing to do is cut off connections with both men, and here’s why:

    You shouldn’t facilitate the poor decisions of two men in any manner. Even if you don’t want a relationship from these men you should consider how their attitudes and treatments towards their partners can be perpetuated onto you. Think about each of their partners and how your choice in this situation will affect them.

    You shouldn’t be the person to come between someone else’s relationship. Don’t assume their burdens by entangling yourself in their drama.

    It’s clear that both of these men are dealing with personal issues within their respective relationships and are acting out using someone else. People who are unhappy in their own relationships, but do little to change their circumstances, aren’t the type of people you want to spend your time with.

    The best thing to do is to remove yourself from these situations through the decisions you make. With the position you’re in, you could even contact the partners of these men to let them know what’s been happening. Sometimes involving yourself further can make things worse, so carry on with caution.

    It may seem tantalizing having two different men as potential lovers, but neither are viable options for you to pursue. While you may think they are the only men interested in you, it’s highly unlikely that is the case. The characters of these two are definitely too shady for any connection to be worth it.

    Don’t allow their behavior to influence you and any desires you may think they fulfill. Be the bigger person and end things before it’s too late to take back a possible bad choice.

    Good luck!

    Sincerely,

    Evergreen

    If you have any questions you’d like to send in, email us at contactthejack@gmail.com. We won’t publish any names and you don’t need to use one.

  • Ask Evergreen: Ending Things Easy

    Ask Evergreen: Ending Things Easy

    Ask Evergreen is a weekly advice column by the students of the Lumberjack.

    Each week we’ll answer anonymous questions sent in by readers about anything and everything.

    Dear Evergreen,

    How do I let someone down easy?

    Dear Easy-Ender,

    It’s never easy to let someone down, whether you’re ending something romantic or platonic. However, there are always civilized ways to cease a connection no matter how strong the bond. If you’re trying to end a toxic relationship, an uninteresting connection or a friendship with someone who is no longer a positive influence, remember these things: be straightforward with your reasoning, be the bigger person and be a badass if you need to.

    Try to understand the reasons why you want to end something. Finding reason can help you cut the connection. Don’t end things hastily, hatefully or immaturely. You can weigh the pros and cons of the situation to understand how continuing things will affect you and the person you’re connected to. Ask yourself why you want to end it and how you’ll be better if you do.

    You don’t always owe people explanations for why you no longer want to have ties to them. If you’re letting someone down that you’ve met on a dating site, or someone you’ve gone out with several times but no longer have interest for, you can leave things with simply saying, “I’m no longer interested.” Don’t worry about patting someone’s ego before bidding farewell, and don’t make excuses for why it’s more your fault than theirs. No one’s at fault, you just don’t have a connection with that person anymore.

    If you’re trying to end a relationship with a long-term partner, you may want to put in more effort to your parting words. Your goodbye to a partner could be cordial or crude depending on your situation and reasons for ending a relationship. You could use more energy by getting angry at them or save your energy and invest it in yourself. Remember, your happiness and well-being come first. Don’t bother appeasing people if they aren’t going to listen to how you’re feeling in a situation, and don’t lose your cool trying to get them to listen. You’re better off focusing on yourself and your healing process.

    You’ve got this!

    Sincerely,

    Evergreen

    If you have any questions you’d like to send in, email us at contactthejack@gmail.com. We won’t publish any names and you don’t need to use one.

  • Ask Evergreen: Meaningful Friendships

    Ask Evergreen: Meaningful Friendships

    Ask Evergreen is a weekly advice column by the students of the Lumberjack.

    Each week we’ll answer anonymous questions sent in by readers about anything and everything.

    Dear Evergreen,

    How do we navigate meaningful friendships in a college setting where friendships are based on talking about bullshit?

    Dear Friendship Keeper,

    Friendships come in all different forms, some healthy and others not. Genuine friendships usually aren’t based from a bond of bullshit talking, but to each their own. You can do a couple different things to avoid befriending bombastic people who blather.

    First, find people that you might have common interests with. This is the easiest place to start when searching for a meaningful connection, as you control who and what you let into your life. Join a club or frequent places that you enjoy to find others interested in similar activities. Strike up a friendly conversation with someone at your favorite bookstore or while you’re hiking in the community forest on a special trail.

    Second, when you notice people itching to gossip or spew meaningless rhetoric, separate yourself from those situations. If you strive to surround yourself with positive-thinking people, chances are one of those people will vibe with you. Don’t settle if it isn’t significant and beneficial to you.

    Third, get out of your comfort zone. Maybe you’ve allowed yourself to become complacent with the type of people who are around you. Change that. Voice your discomfort when it comes to people forcing their absurdities upon you. Challenge yourself to push for what you want rather than settling for what others push onto you. If you don’t want to have small talk about the weather, or a heated conversation about politics, say something to change that. Be the navigator of this ship we call life, and choose who you want on your crew.

    Lastly, it’s okay if you’re a lone wolf for the time being. It’s no fun when people around you drain your energy, so don’t feel selfish for choosing not to have them in your life. Sometimes we just need to self-reflect and ask ourselves if what we have is enough. The best things come to those who wait, right? A meaningful friendship can’t be forced, so don’t rush into anything and trust your gut.

    All the best!

    Sincerely,

    Evergreen

    If you have any questions you’d like to send in, email us at contactthejack@gmail.com. We won’t publish any names and you don’t need to use one.