By Jasmin Shirazian
Hi Jasmin,
Can I be in love with someone I’m not dating? This situationship has got me fucked up.
How do I answer this without coming off like a complete bitch? Your situationship is not real. That’s not to say your feelings aren’t real, or that the love doesn’t exist – but a situationship is not a real thing. The creation of the label “situationship” has opened the doors for this generation to participate in an unwinnable battle: The IDGAF wars. I like you, so let’s find out which one of us can care the least to keep the other person interested without fully committing?
What is a situationship? To me, it’s one person caring more than the other. One person giving more than the other. One person receiving more than the other — you get it. A situationship will never fulfill you in the ways you’re looking for. Rather, this infatuation will leave you feeling more hollow. One person will always have more power than the other.
That’s not to say I don’t understand where you’re coming from; you caught feelings for the wrong person. It happens to the best of us. At the core of it, we are all just creatures looking for love, security, comfort, happiness; we want to feel desired and safe. There is no safety in a situationship. In fact, more often than not, they all have a three month shelf life. Seriously, name one situationship where things stayed good after that three month mark — if that existed, it would evolve into a relationship.
“We accept the love we think we deserve.”
Everyone, their mother and their mother’s single best friend knows this phrase. It’s true though! We often don’t love ourselves enough to believe we deserve better, and so we stay in the situation(ships) we know because it’s the space we’ve decided to fill. You deserve to take up space with someone who will appreciate how you light up the room.
xoxo,
Jasmin
Be First to Comment